Entries by Jason Tesch

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Dear Survivor: You Are Fearfully and Wonderfully Made

Dear Fellow Survivor,

I’ve already shared with you that one of the most long-lasting effects of the abuse I experienced is a profoundly distorted view of my body (something called body dysmorphia). The specific details of the abuse seared onto my mind images of myself and beliefs about myself that plague me to this day. For decades, it was impossible for me to see my body as it actually was. Even today, I often struggle with that. It’s hard for me to put into words just how much pain this terribly skewed view of my body has caused me.

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Dear Survivor: You Are Not Alone

Dear Fellow Survivor,

Few things in my life have made me feel quite as isolated as having experienced sexual abuse. First, there was the isolation of the abuse itself. The secrecy. The shame. The inability to tell anyone what was going on. Then there was the isolation I felt when I began to realize that what I had experienced all those years ago was sexual abuse. No one I knew had experienced anything like what I had experienced. (At least, that’s what I thought.) And the ongoing shame made it seem unthinkable that I could ever share what had happened to me with anyone else, including my wife.

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Dear Survivor: It’s OK To Struggle

I’ve mentioned that one of the effects of the abuse I experienced is a grossly distorted body image, something that psychologists call body dysmorphic disorder. I have been plagued by this ever since the abuse happened. It has gotten a lot better since I’ve started therapy with my counselor. But it’s not completely gone. It tends to come in cycles. I’m feeling good for a while and then, wham! Something triggers it and I’m feeling awful again. This past week was one of those weeks.

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Step Four: Assess Your Space

Children need a safe environment in which they can learn God’s Word. Careful facility design is an important step to overall child safety. Providing a safe environment for kids involves regular safety inspections for items like outlet covers and at least an annual site assessment. An area often overlooked is outside spaces where youth will […]

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Deep As The Sea

Deep as the Sea: Letters to Survivors of Trauma by Timothy C. Bourman is written for the survivor of trauma. Survivors of sexual assault, as well as childhood abuse, natural disasters, veterans with PTSD, survivors of a mass shooting, or horrific accident – all will find healing and help in these pages.

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Talking Jesus With A Survivor

Child abuse does not only affect a child’s body and emotional health. It touches their spiritual health, too. A child who was abused may have difficulty believing in a loving God. They may believe that they have some intrinsic quality that means God cannot care for them. Sometimes this comes as a direct result of hearing ugly words from the abuser. Other times, it comes from the child’s internal thoughts.

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Misbeliefs: I’m All Alone

Many survivors of childhood abuse report feelings of being alone in the world, that no one can understand them. These feelings are deeply rooted in the abuse, where the perpetrator methodically created a private space of, “Don’t tell.” They come from feelings of shame survivors experience, making them unwilling to disclose their abuse.

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Misbeliefs: It’s My Fault

Survivors of trauma, whether childhood abuse, sexual assault, or domestic abuse, share a belief that the abuse was their fault. A person abused as a child may believe they were not loveable enough, or they could have stopped the abuse. Children who are sexually abused by a caregiver believe that they acted in a way that made the perpetrator want to have sex with them.

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Coping with Flashbacks

People who have experienced trauma may experience flashbacks in their everyday lives. Flashbacks can be intense and bring back the emotions and senses experienced during the trauma. These memories are felt as if they are currently happening, rather than something that occurred in the past.

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What Is A Trigger?

Experiencing a sudden onset of the feelings and emotions that you felt during an abusive situation is a common experience for survivors. This is because the brain records and stores traumatic memories differently from non-traumatic ones. Trauma floods the body with hormones that turn off certain parts of the brain and make other parts go into overdrive.